Memory's "UNCANNY'ed" Thought of The Day: Time vs. Money

Want to know if a man or woman really likes you? The subject of time vs. money can help you determine this desiring question.

Ok, ladies, so you meet a man at the club last weekend. You two talk and hit off, and decide to go out on Monday night to that sushi restaurant on Division Street (if you don’t know what I’m talking about, then you really need to grab a clue from somewhere) at 8:00 sharp. You get there on time (for a change), order yourself a cocktail, and before you realize it, an hour has passed. This fool has just stood you up! Now, I’m hoping that if this has ever happened to you before that you at least finish your drink and take a mental note to never call him again. You get home, get ready for bed, and you see that you have a voicemail from your missing date saying that he wants to take you shopping, and all of a sudden you have totally forgotten that this man just stood you up tonight….HOLD THE PHONE!!!!

Ok, this brings me to my first point: What in the hot club hell are you thinking?? I’m not even going to touch the fact the he still didn’t tell you why he left you hanging at the sushi bar!! More importantly, when a man decides to spend money on you, do not think for a hot second that means that he likes you. When it comes to men, money does not equal affection. Think about it. Men spend money on some of the sketchiest and most stupid things: gambling, lap dances at the strip club, and lest we forget THE WORLD’S LARGEST ADULT BOOKSTORE! What?? I know you didn’t think it’s us women who are keeping them in business! When men spend loads of money on you, ma’am, you have just become a human investment. Trust me, I’ve seen it happen! Now, on another note, when a man is offering his time other than his money, darling, you have hit the Good Black Man (GBM) jackpot!! Picture this: It’s Super Bowl Sunday, and your guy’s friends are all getting together to goof off, drink beer, and watch the game. You have tickets to some whack ballet that you’ve been dying to see. Now, since you’ve hit the GBM jackpot, of course he’s going to the ballet instead of watching the Super Bowl, and additionally, to go along with the mortifying show of grown men in tights and horrible music, he’s going to get CLOWNED by his boys; hell for that matter, I’d clown him too! The point is you got your guy’s time—and not just any time—the time usually spent with his boys. A man is very stingy with this particular type of time. A man’s time with his boys is very symbolic. Now, I know this seems far fetched, but ask any man about the unwritten rule when it comes to ‘guy time’: NO GIRLS ALLOWED!!! It’s like the HE-MAN Woman Haters Club (that one was for my Lil’ Rascal fans)! Essentially, when it comes to a man’s time, it is closely tied to his heart.

Don’t think I’ve forgotten about you men! Guys, I’m going to be very frank with you: just like a man’s wallet doesn’t equal affection, a woman’s time does not equal affection. I have a friend who specializes in spending a lot of time with men only to tell them ‘I just want to be your friend’, and you, being the prideful and egotistical male nature has brought you up to be, don’t believe that she only wants to be your friend—of course until you see her out with your best friend. Now you’re mad and picking your jaw off the floor, saying to yourself, ‘but we spent so much time together!’ Here’s an unwritten rule that guys don’t know about: if you find yourself spending a lot of ‘time’ with a woman…SURPRISE!!! You’re the guy that lets us women in on all the men’s secrets…SUCKER!!!! So don’t be fooled, sir. If you keep asking us out and offering free dinners, nine times out of ten we’re going to take you up on your offer. Now, this brings me to another point: if the woman PAYS for the dinner, then you sir, have hit the GOOD BLACK WOMAN (GBW) jackpot. It is my philosophy that when a woman actually pulls out her wallet and offers to pay for something, it is safe to assume that this chick may be diggin’ you. Think about it. All our lives, we as women have been taught that a man is supposed to be our provider, our night and shining armor, and our prince charming, and if you’re from the South the whole essence of chivalry includes a man paying for everything. So, when a woman decides to travel outside of the box of etiquette and say to you, “Don’t worry about, I got the check tonight.” You got yourself a winner sir (or in the words of my ‘guy friend’, “She’s ready”)! A woman’s money is sacred, so if you get a chick to open her purse, you pretty much can steal not only her wallet, but her open heart, as well.

In the end, we’re all investing something in someone: a woman who’s interested in a man will invest her money, and a man who’s interested in a woman will invest his time. So in conclusion, what is your mate, crush, or partner investing when it comes to you? Time? Or Money?

Until Next Time,

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